My state of mind :

"Crazy"

In a church by the face
He talks about the people going under
Only child know
A man decides after seventy years
That what he goes there for
Is to unlock the door
While those around him criticize and sleep
And through a fractal on that breaking wall
I see you my friend and touch your face again
Miracles will happen as we trip
But we're never gonna survive unless
We get a little crazy
No we're never gonna survive unless
We are a little
Crazy cray crazy
Crazy are the people walking through my head
One of thems got a gun to shoot the other one
And yet together they were friends at school
Get it, get it, get it, yeah!
If all were there when we first took the pill
Then maybe then maybe then maybe then maybe
Miracles will happen as we speak
But we're never gonna survive unless
We get a little crazy
No we're never gonna survive unless
We are a little
Crazy
No no we'll never survive unless we get a little bit
A man decides to go along after seventy years
Oh darlin
In a sky full of people only some want to fly
Isn't that crazy
In a world full of people only some want to fly
Isn't that crazy
Crazy
In a heaven of people there's only some want to fly
Ain't that crazy
Oh babe Oh darlin'
In a world full of people there's only some want to fly
Isn't that crazy
Isn't that crazy Isn't that crazy Isn't that crazy
Ohh
But we're never gonna survive unless we get a little crazy crazy
No we're never gonna to survive unless we are a little crazy
But we're never gonna survive unless we get a little crazy crazy
No we're never gonna to survive unless we are a little crazy
No no never survive unless we get a little bit
And then you see things
The size of which you've never known before
They'll break it
Someday
Only child know
Them things
The size
Of which you've never known before
Someday

ummmm.... bunk it...

it tought seeing nani try and cope over nana not bieng there anymore every day..... its not going to happen in a day... but thank god she has adequate support... i end up feeling so miserable every now and then.. i wonder what shes going through.... to be married for 51 years... to share each others lives for all the time... and then suddenly one day..... you wake up to remember that the other person isnt there anymore..... maybe ive over simplified it... but i guess all the good times make the pain worthwhile....kudos to the institution of marraige....

Things have changed so much since i got back last time...
Nanaji is no more..... things have changed so so much..... i cant seem to be able to identify all the changes... its all a massive blur.... but yes..... i wish i was there when he died..... noone told me anything.... and coming back and facing the reality which was as harsh as this.... wasnt quite easy.....
Its been a rough 15 days....

right im back...
wonder why they shut off all the blogs.... bloody hell....
jury on the 27th..... slogging my butt off....

So bloody correct man... calvin rocks... hes the modern kid.. and then again also questions the adult within us.... hes the perfect devil, and also the perfect angel.... the one kid who isnt a stereotype... rocking aint he?

a decent paper.... but then again... professional practice... u never know.... who reads the bullshit that they teach us, and compares it to the bullshit that they know... lol... u never know how things will be with subjects like this

ahem....
exams in the horizon.... in less than 24 hours... and i just started studying... wish me luck guys... im really bamboozled... professional practise... lol...
lets see what happens... shockingly, none of us seem to be tensed one bit...
maybe its a good thing...
lets see what happens...

And then god said, there shall be noise... !!!!!!

Some of the goddamn idiots living around us are the biggest bloody ******* ive seen. O the friggin idiots start washing thier clothes at like 5 in the morning, and my room faces and balcony which faces thiers.... and make it conveneient to grunt like the Maria Sharapovas on TV every time they raise the poor clothes over thier heads and bring the down with such a bang, that a dead man would spring alive.

Its either the clothes, or the bloody utensils, i wonder how many they use in day... theyre always washing, it is soooo irritating.

They make it a point to stand there and shout if we play music a wee bit louder than usual, or any of us soccer enthusiasts lets out a little scream. But then again, i wish i could go over to thier place and smash something up, to make them realise that if i play something loud it has melody, what u have banging outside ur house is a like .... NOISE !!

Im doing a bio tech facility for my thesis, finally, the entire process ends... or rather starts..
Its been a nice day, the sun behind the clouds, the faint glow all around... The breeze, or should i call it a gale...
it was like this when i was in first year... then it all seemed to have changed, mans effect on his climate... but now its back...
lets see maybe we could make a trip to DD Hills sometime... it wud so rock...

awright...
all of em buggers are slowly moving out of Kolkata... Arjun is a Mumbai man now... and from the scene of things, i dont think hes moving anywhere else very soon.
Everyone has moved on with thier lives, ever so fast faced all over the face of this earth. Everyone i knew is walking the path to different lives, and different situations.
I dont know what the city will look like for me in the next couple of years, somehow i have a feeling that im going right back to it once im done with my studies.
People say its a dead city, but then again, i think there is more it to it than that, people everywhere need a place to stay, and as long as that is there, people like me come into the picture... the never ending business of construction.
But then again, its fab to see all this, people movin on in different directions....
It was a revelation for me, when i came here four years ago, to live on my own, to grow on my own, today i guess its the same for everyone else who's moving away... in one way or the other
cheers mates... to our new lives...

ah well....
my forgetful self...
sometimes i wonder why i forget somethings in one moment...
if ur wondering what im aiming at... well thats meant for me to know and you to guess...
but its rather human to be like this....
or so they say....

I want to run
I want to hide
I want to tear down the walls
That hold me inside
I want to reach out
And touch the flame
Where the streets have no name

I want to feel sunlight on my face
I see the dust cloud disappear
Without a trace
I want to take shelter from the poison rain
Where the streets have no name

Where the streets have no name
Where the streets have no name
We're still building
Then burning down loveBurning down love
And when I go there
I go there with you
It's all I can do
The city's aflood
And our love turns to rust
We're beaten and blown by the wind
Trampled in dust
I'll show you a place
High on a desert plain
Where the streets have no name
Where the streets have no name
Where the streets have no name

We're still building
Then burning down love
Burning down love
And when I go there
I go there with you
It's all I can do
Our love turns to rust
We're beaten and blown by the wind
Blown by the windOh, and I see love
See our love turn to rust
We're beaten and blown by the wind
Blown by the windOh, when I go thereI go there with you
It's all I can do....

lovely aint it?

this aint fair...
i so wanted to get wet in the rain today.... just stand there for sometime...
and now it aint raining anymore...

i wonder if the weather has also become a lot like a lot of people i know...
like u end up having to swear at them for things to work...
lol... well... i said it was hot and sticky.... but now its back to bieng to its age old self....
nice and windy..... rather.. amazing actually

see... this is what happens..... i praised the weather yesterday and now its back to bieng all hot and sticky.. im supposed to do a lot of work today...
my admit card.... my thesis synopsis... everything goes in today....
well its all a matter of a few print outs so.... :)

thought of the day :

Eccentricity is not, as dull people would have us believe, a form of madness. It is often a kind of innocent pride, and the man of genius and the aristocrat are frequently regarded as eccentrics because genius and aristocrat are entirely unafraid of and uninfluenced by the opinions and vagaries of the crowd.

(1887 - 1964), Taken Care Of ,1965

hmmm...
the bloody weather, so bloody rocks....
i love the wind blowing against my face.... the rain outside my window... the cuppa coffee with me as i stare out....

ive been trying myself to start studying in advance for seven sems. now... lol
wondering whether its going to do any good trying this time..... the last week seems to have dissappeared into thin air... we've done nothing...

i shall of course travel to the city tommorrow.. or so i hope... maybe i wont ....
i shall be using the telephone to good effect... lets see if the buggers there listen....

remenescence of old times.... its all so bitter sweet...
just a month ago is old now....
i wonder.... how long will everything in our lives keep floating...
when does it all settle down...

suprise..surprise....
Masood Hussain turned up out of the blue..... nice to see him doing well, nd looking rather well fed... rather interesting...
Its good to see him.... with all the people leaving.... him coming back has been quite a revelation....
Varma left the other day.... the evenings are not the same anymore... thanks to this net connection.... we're occupied to some extent... but beyond that we've been constantly looking for something to do...

I dont know about everyone else... but i do miss the evenings... bitchin.. laughing... pulling each others legs... there is just so much we have done... that.... i dont know...
There seems to be no reason to go out, because noone calls us anymore... noone hollers... "ABHIIII.... chal juice pe ke aate hain"

things are so different.... it doesnt seem like its going to be the same anymore... everyone has moved on...as must we...